Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
