I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
