Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
