why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize