No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
