dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
