i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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