He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize