She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
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