hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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