I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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