Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
He's a Shit stain on my heart
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
