how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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