Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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