Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
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