Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Randomize
