Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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