Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
