If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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