so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Fuck appropriateness.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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