Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
