I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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