How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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