I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
