Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
When did angry sex become our thing?
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
