You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize