Where are you?
In a non slutty way
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
