just tell him i said nine months
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Thank you for not boning my boss.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
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