Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
and you fell through a lawn chair
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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