i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
