it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Randomize
