so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize
