it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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