But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
