Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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