There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
