Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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