Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize