fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
