Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
