Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
So much Jack, so little girl.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
