so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
