And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
