I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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