Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
