So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Randomize
