Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize