Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
