I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
