I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Boobs speak an international language.
Your cock deserves a montage
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
