I should be sponsored by Trojan
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
