dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
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