apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Why is there bacon in the couch?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
